Trying to Conceive (TTC)? What Really Helps — Beyond Ovulation Calculators
When you start trying to fall pregnant, most advice sounds deceptively simple. Track your cycle. Time intercourse. Take a prenatal. Try to relax. And honestly: sex, fun, excitement - it all sounds amazing.
But anyone who’s been through it knows — TTC can be an emotional, physical, and mental rollercoaster. Hope one week, disappointment the next. Pressure builds quickly, often without warning.
Here’s some top tips to take note of when deep in the world of TTC, from an integrative perspective. Bookmark this and send it to your TTC pals.
From a conventional fertility perspective, experts generally recommend:
1. Conception Is About Timing — And Preparation
Timing sex around ovulation matters, but preparing your body first is just as important. Oh, and clearly, ovulation matters (if you’re not quite sure if you’re ovulating, let’s get you confident here first!).
Fertility experts recommend:
Having intercourse every 2–3 days, especially during your fertile window, to optimise sperm availability without adding pressure
Maintaining a healthy weight, as being underweight or overweight can impact ovulation, hormone signalling, and sperm quality
Stopping smoking, and limiting alcohol and recreational drugs, all of which can negatively affect egg and sperm health
Taking pre-pregnancy supplements for at least 3 months before TTC
(We go through this together in detail in your fertility appointments with me, but top of the list is a high-quality prenatal with active folate and adequate choline)Seeing your chosen healthcare team early for blood tests, medication reviews, and personalised guidance — not just when things feel “wrong”
All sensible advice. All evidence-based.
And yet — this is the part nobody really talks about — doing everything “right” doesn’t guarantee an easy or quick journey.
TCM perspective: In Chinese medicine, fertility isn’t just about timing and biology — it’s about the whole system. Fertility thrives when:
Qi flows freely (stress and stagnation don’t dominate the cycle)
Blood and Essence (Jing) are well nourished, supporting healthy ovulation and implantation
The Shen (mind-spirit) feels calm and supported, rather than constantly bracing for disappointment
When stress, over-monitoring, pressure, or burnout creep in, the body often feels it before tests show it.
That’s why TTC can feel so intense — it’s not just a physical process, it’s deeply emotional. And acknowledging that doesn’t mean you’re “doing it wrong.” It means you’re human.
2. Timing Sex — Smart, Not Stressful
Here’s a reassuring truth many people don’t hear early enough: you don’t need perfect timing to get pregnant.
Sperm can survive in the reproductive tract for up to ~ five days, while the egg itself is only viable for around 24 hours after ovulation. This built-in overlap means the window is more forgiving than most apps would have you believe.
Regular sex every 2–3 days around your fertile window is usually enough to maximise your chances — without turning sex into a scheduled task or a source of pressure (because there’s nothing as fun as timed sex, not).
For many people, over-tracking can actually do more harm than good. Constantly checking basal body temperature, analysing every twinge, or watching an app like a hawk often increases stress — and yes, there are times I’ve gently (or not so gently) told patients to step away from the data altogether.
From a TCM perspective: Fertility responds better when you listen to your body rather than fight it. Subtle cyclical cues (such as changes in cervical mucus, shifts in energy, sensations of warmth) often say more than a calendar ever could. Listen to these cyclical cues rather than obsessing over the calendar.
Sometimes, less tracking creates more trust; and trust is a powerful thing when you’re trying to conceive.
3. Your Health Before Pregnancy Really (Truly) Matters
What you do before you start trying can make a bigger difference than most people realise. Think of it as preparing the soil before planting a seed — it’s not sexy, but really pays off.
This is where your body builds the foundation for healthy eggs, healthy sperm, and a pregnancy that feels more supported from the start.
Supplements: Ideally, both partners start these at least three months before conception. That’s how long it takes for eggs and sperm to develop, and the environment they’re growing in matters.
Quality counts here. Practitioner-grade supplements with highly absorbable forms of active folate, iodine, vitamin D, zinc, and antioxidants make a real difference. Minimal fillers, no unnecessary additives. Some popular over-the-counter brands look impressive on the label, but not all of them are ideal when you’re trying to conceive.
Think of this as giving your body a well-stocked toolkit, not just throwing random pills at the problem and hoping for the best.
Exercise: Moderate, consistent movement is the sweet spot. Too little can affect hormone signalling; too much can stress the body, reduce ovulation frequency, or negatively impact sperm quality.
You don’t need extremes. Brisk walking, gentle strength work, yoga, or swimming all support circulation, blood sugar balance, and hormonal health — all essential for fertility. And as a bonus? Movement is one of the most effective ways to lower stress, which quietly interferes with fertility more than most people realise.
Lifestyle: This is the unsexy part. Stop smoking. Limit or skip alcohol. Reduce caffeine.
Yes, the social pressure is real. But even small amounts can influence egg quality, sperm quality, and implantation. Framing this as temporary inconvenience for long-term gain helps — you’re creating the safest possible starting point for a future pregnancy, not committing to a lifetime of deprivation.
Medical check‑ins: When you book in for fertility care with me, I’ll usually recommend a thorough set of blood tests — iron, thyroid function, vitamin levels, immunity markers, and more — alongside a medication and health review.
You want to know your baseline before you’re deep in the process. It’s not about assuming something is wrong — it’s about avoiding surprises halfway through. I’ve seen hiccups enough times to get this stuff sorted in the beginning!
Partner health matters (a lot): This one deserves emphasis: sperm health is not a side note. Fertility is a team sport, and male factors contribute to around 40–50% of fertility challenges (source).
Sperm quality and quantity have declined significantly over recent decades — by some estimates, sperm counts have dropped by around 60% over the past 40 years. Lifestyle factors, environmental exposures, stress, metabolic health, and modern chemical burdens all play a role.
Which means your partner’s health isn’t just “helpful” — it’s foundational.
TCM perspective: In Chinese medicine, balanced lifestyle choices and nourishment support Blood and Essence (Jing), creating the internal conditions needed for conception to occur with less strain on the system.
Because fertility doesn’t start at ovulation — it starts with how supported the whole body feels, long before the cycle even begins.
4. Irregular Cycles or Transitioning from Birth Control
Most people will see periods return within 1–6 months of ceasing contraception, but that range is wide for a reason. Age, the type of contraception you were using, and your baseline hormone health all matter.
Hormonal birth control suppresses ovulation. When you stop, your body has to re-establish its own rhythm again. That takes time.
During this transition, it’s common to see:
Cycles that are irregular or unpredictable
Periods that are heavier, lighter, or just different
Changes in PMS, mood, or energy
Occasional spotting or delayed ovulation
Annoying? Yes. Automatically pathological? No.
That said — if things stay erratic, or you don’t feel like your body is finding its feet, that’s when support is useful rather than just waiting it out.
How to Support Your Cycle (Without Micromanaging It)
This is not the time for extremes.
Eat properly. Regular meals with enough protein and carbs matter more than any supplement when hormones are trying to recalibrate.
Manage stress realistically. Chronic stress can delay ovulation post-pill. You don’t need to be ‘zen’, but you do need recovery time.
Exercise moderately. Movement helps. Over-training doesn’t. If your cycle disappears when training ramps up, that’s information. (Read this one again!!)
Track lightly. Know roughly what your cycle is doing, but don’t turn it into a second job. Data is only helpful if it’s not fuelling anxiety.
TCM perspective: In Chinese medicine, irregular cycles often reflect Liver Qi disruption, Blood insufficiency, or Yin–Yang imbalance — essentially, the system hasn’t re-synced yet. Treatment focuses on restoring rhythm and resilience, not forcing ovulation on a schedule.
Bottom line? This is adjustment, not dysfunction. Your system may need proper support — not pressure — to regulate again.
5. Age Matters — But It’s Not the Whole Story
Yes, age matters. Hormones shift over time, and from your mid-30s onwards there’s a gradual decline in both egg quantity and egg quality — even in people who are otherwise very healthy. We’re born with a finite number of eggs, and that reserve naturally decreases with age. That part isn’t controversial.
What often gets missed though, is that age isn’t the only variable.
How you prepare matters. Lifestyle, nutrition, metabolic health, stress load, and hormonal balance all influence how well your body works with the eggs it has. Earlier preparation can meaningfully improve your chances — even if you’re starting later than you’d planned.
This isn’t about panic or racing the clock. It’s about stacking the odds in your favour by supporting your baseline health, rather than assuming age alone decides the outcome.
TCM perspective: In Chinese medicine, reproductive capacity reflects the state of Kidney Essence, which does decline with age. Supporting Yin, Yang, Qi, and Blood helps optimise fertility potential at any stage — not by turning back time, but by working with what’s available.
6. When to Seek Specialist Support
Not falling pregnant straight away doesn’t mean something is wrong. Even in ideal circumstances, conception can take time — up to 12 months is considered normal.
What does help is knowing when waiting is reasonable, and when getting extra eyes on things is simply pragmatic.
This is also why I like to see people for at least 3 months before they start trying to conceive. That way, we can optimise nutrition, hormones, and lifestyle ahead of time, rather than playing catch-up after a delay.
Fertility specialists generally recommend seeking support if:
You’ve been trying for 6 months or more and are 35 or over
You’ve been trying for 12 months or more and are under 35
At that point, assessment isn’t about jumping straight to IVF. It’s about understanding what’s actually going on.
Typically, this includes looking at:
Ovulation and hormone patterns, and in some cases egg reserve markers
Male factors — sperm quality plays a role in around 40% of fertility challenges
Structural factors, such as fallopian tube patency and the uterine environment
From there, options can range widely — from targeted lifestyle or medication support, to ovulation induction, IUI, or IVF — depending on what the picture shows. The goal is appropriate intervention, not unnecessary escalation.
TCM perspective: When systems feel “stuck,” Chinese medicine works alongside medical care rather than replacing it. Supporting the nervous system, nourishing Blood, improving Qi flow, and strengthening Kidney Essence can help create a more receptive internal environment — even while following a conventional treatment plan.
Final Thought
This isn’t about something being ‘wrong’ with you. Your body is a complex, interconnected system that responds to how it’s nourished, rested, and supported.
Trying to conceive isn’t a sprint; it’s a process. Focus on getting the fundamentals right: nutrition, hormones, sleep, and stress. Support your body, work with its rhythm, and give it the environment it needs, fertility often follows when everything else is in place.